Have you ever noticed how many traditions ask you to start your exercise with the right side? “Now, reach out with your right hand …”
The right hand side is associated with action in the world. Sometimes, i feel sympathy for my left side. Like it always comes second, left out in the darkness, while the right side enjoys the limelight, the focus, the initiatory glow. While it shines for the world, my left side is left in the shadows, the unconscious realms compared to the conscious, the passive, the unknown. I always thought this was a patriarchy thing, but it seems to cross boundaries and occur even in the most goddess loving circles. Maybe it’s just an inherited trait, a cultural habit … but still, those come from somewhere too and they continue because they are supported and not undermined, dissolved, marginalised by a stronger habit, a better choice.
But it struck me as i stretched towards the sky with my right hand, that the left hand of darkness is not secondary, left behind or out, but the support for our action or work as we reach out. The left hand side is what holds us together as we go out into the world, as we seek aid and build alliances, as we stretch out beyond our comfort zone, as we test our limits. The left hand (and foot, etc) is what we rest in, rely on, hold to, act out of. We are grounded in shadow, whether we like it or not, when we present our light to the world.
And like all good spiritual insights, this also works vice versa; the right hand becomes support as our left hand reaches out into the world. Thus, we build confidence throughout our system, round out character, become more whole. It is a matter of balance; one side out, one side down. Then, the other side out, the other side down.
As above, so below; as right, so left; as in, so out … and so on. Let 2021 be your year of focusing on your inner world, as you act in the outer world, so that both act in consort, one grounding and supporting the other, in turn, until all paths become one, as they always were. An ecologically inspired politics, growing out of a deep sense of comfort with ourselves and with our role in the cosmic tragicomic drama; with our lives, with our deaths; with our feeling for what happens and with our dreams, with our breath and heartbeat and muscles and sinews and nervous systems and our entire bodymind and consciousness free of all limit as well. With everything.
Sometimes, it makes sense to make time for certain things. If you haven’t enjoyed a good, deep belly laugh for a while – not an online lol, a real fall off the couch laughing so hard, actual rolling around on the floor moment – then it might be time to create space for the experience. Especially if you have been taking in too much climate science or suffering heart ache. Compartmentalise for joy, just as you might for a good walk or run.
We can’t just assume that we are going to get a healthy portion of all the good life vitamins like laughter out of everyday life. Sometimes we gotta make it happen!
Same for crying. Especially for blokes. When was the last time you really let rip with a flood of tears? I’m the first to admit I don’t get enough of this emotional release. I got raised to be an Aussie bloke, which means I had my tear ducts surgically removed by a protracted but very clear process of socialisation 🙂 Well, mostly, anyway. I can pull out the flood gates once every few years, but it dries up too quickly. What I wouldn’t give for a full-blooded session of wailing like my kids get to do! Sometimes, when they’re crying really hard over something very close to nothing, I feel a bit jealous. Occasionally I’ll even tell them this. “You’re lucky, you can cry,” I say, and let them, while comforting them and letting it happen.
But the point again is that everyday life doesn’t always support us to have a full emotional spectrum. So, if we want to live fully, sometimes we have to make time and space for a cry or a laugh. Otherwise, we might fall for the flatline of emotional non-affect that is promoted (subliminally at least) by the 24/7 media hype circus of permanent goggle-eyed wonderment that is modern digital life. And that would be a shame, for conscious, self-aware beings with fun primate bodies and a deep evolutionary need for company and all the tears and laughter that brings with it.
So, Compartmentalise: make some time, give yourself some prompts (when I was a kid, I would imagine my dog dying, which was the worst thing I could possibly imagine, to make myself cry), and let rip.
Then, naturally, Integrate: give yourself time to let it all come together. When it’s done, you’ll feel better, more integrated, just knowing all that endless grief and joy is part of you too. And you don’t have to answer to that; it’s just part of the unending journey that is being and becoming the unrepeatable experience of life in and as your bodymind. Feel that nature calling and let go into it.
